How to fight well and quality

A life without strife and conflict is a utopia. But to mitigate the detrimental effects of these daily, life-changing conflicts, several rules of the game need to be learned. Just like love and tolerance, strife is a skill to be mastered.

Here are some rules to keep in mind:


To begin with, we must be aware that it is forbidden to react in affect! Instead of engaging in a "head and tail" argument without a well-defined cause and purpose, a argument in which we would very likely say a lot that we don't think at all just because we are angry, it would be wiser to throw out more anger through eg physical activity .

Only “clear heads” are able to think somewhat objectively and act tolerably.


A sense of equality with a partner is an inevitable prerequisite for a quality fight. If one stands above the other, the mutual interest of the discussion is completely lost, and the quarrel often begins to develop in the wrong direction. Both partners need to feel competent and free to express their opinions, attitudes and feelings.


The reason for the altercation should be something concrete, something real. It often happens that the cause of the altercation cannot be defined at all. We often invent reasons for our inner turmoil and discontent, or for some of the repressed conflicts of the past. Such quarrels are usually reduced to shaking and experiencing, which can only act destructively.


If we are honest with ourselves and our partner, if we acknowledge what we feel, if we express our thoughts freely, such a quarrel will only result in greater connection and mutual trust.

A fight does not necessarily have to be something negative, and if we adhere to a few simple rules, we can easily turn it into a quality part of the relationship.

A good quarrel can allow catharsis, purify emotions, it can strengthen love, deepen a relationship, intensify closeness between partners! But the most important thing is to admit to ourselves what is its cause and purpose!

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